Guilty As Charged....

Being pregnant the second time around is certainly different…I’ve had an enormous amount of guilt lately.  Guilt about being too busy to make sure I’m eating as healthy as I did the first time around.  Guilt about getting far too little sleep each night.  Guilt about not taking the time to lay in bed and put my hands on my belly and daydream about this little peanut growing inside of me.  I remember being pregnant with Marley and driving in my car, having long conversations with her about what her daddy was like, where we lived, how excited we were to meet her…………..and that saddles me with even more guilt.  I haven’t taken the time to utter as much as a “hi baby” to this new little one.  This all probably sounds absurd, but it makes me sad!    

I was reminded of my guilt again today, as I walked out of Caribou this morning and had a plethora of strangers smile and say hello to me, glancing at my belly, holding doors open, etc.  And it made my day because, quite honestly, I’m feeling chubby and awkward lately……….but for some reason, the world just smiles at pregnant ladies.  Well, they smile at pregnant ladies because it really is such a beautiful thing, probably one of the most beautiful things.  And then I got in my car and my eyes welled up with tears and I felt sad and guilty…AGAIN, because the world is being extra nice to me, in my pregnant state, and here I am, too busy to even acknowledge the miracle going on inside of me.  Oh, the hormones……………they make any normal woman nutty.  Can anyone relate????

Plan of action…….start taking time (even just a little bit of time) to recognize little babe #2.  With my pregnancy nearing the ½ way mark, it’s time to “soak it all in” because, realistically, I may never be pregnant again (2 for sure, maybe 3)!  So, I’ll try to take a few moments each day to talk to this babe, leave time in my day to get to my Blooma Yoga DVD (which I love, by the way), and maybe hit up a class or two at their studio in Edina.  Let’s face it, I could use some relaxation/meditation and that would be the perfect escape for me, plus it would help with the early aches and pains I’m feeling, caused by my growing belly.

I hope everyone had a fabulous Father’s Day weekend.  We had a relaxing few days at home, which was nice considering we’ll be out of town the next 3 weekends.  A couple photos of the little Miss Marley, fully engaged in laughter and craziness with daddy this weekend:

And a few more of the Miss Marley enjoying her bathtime.......her face just makes me melt!  How did I get so lucky to have her in my life?????  

Random Tidbits...

I love that summer is finally here, but I hate the fact that I can’t, for the life of me, keep a plant alive!  Seriously, what is wrong with me?  Most of the time, Travis is watering my one lonely pot of flowers and my one lonely pot of herbs……….I’m a complete failure when it comes to any type of gardening.  Add that to my list of things to get better at (along with meal planning and keeping up on cleaning the house).  Check!

Ahhh…such is life.  Certain things fall to the wayside so that we can spend more time on what is really important.  I’ve decided I can let go of my manic-obsessive “clean house days” and welcome a more lived in home, so long as it means I get to spend more quality time with Marley!  I’m good at dropping the dust cloth so that I can take her outside to run and play in the yard, or so that we can bring her on an impromptu trip to DQ for an ice cream cone.  The little things…yes, they do all add up to make life one great BIG thing worth appreciating.

This past weekend, we made our way down to Faribault to visit family.  My mom actually had some water damage in her house due to a malfunctioning dishwasher (ick), and Travis is going to be re-tiling their kitchen floor and doing a bunch more work in their basement.  Marley always has fun playing with her cousins, but now she’s at an age where she can really go off and explore with them.  She didn’t want to miss any of the action and tagged along wherever they went.  We were hoping to make a trip to the pool, but the weather didn’t cooperate………seriously, can we get more than one weekend of sunshine this summer?!  My sister took some great pics of the kiddos:

And you’ll see my baby belly is busy growing.  My sister snapped this photo while we were hanging out at her house on Saturday morning.  16 weeks!  I’m starting to feel the little flutters of movement in my tummy and I LOVE IT!!  It’s just surreal to me…..to look down at my belly and think that, yep, this is really happening.  We have another one on the way and the sudden appearance of my baby bump is proof of that!  I have another appointment and an ultrasound on June 30^th……..so we can see how baby #2 is growing/progressing and (hopefully) we can find out if we’re welcoming another little lady into our lives, or a little boy!!  Either way, I’m happy!  I’ll keep you posted!

Here are a few more photos of our growing girl.  She is getting so big………tall and skinny!  And that hair?!  It’s making an appearance, SLOWLY but surely!  It’s fuzzy and brown.  I’m thinking she’ll get my curls, but we’ll see!  I SO despised my hair as a kid, heck…..I hated my hair until I got into college and came to terms with it.  But I think I can teach Marley to appreciate a head full of curly locks!  As for now, I don’t have any idea of what she will look like once that hair does come in!  I can’t even picture it on her!  She’s been my bald girl for soooooooooo long!

We celebrated Trav's 30th birthday a little early at the cabin over Memorial Day....what a fun weekend with Grandma and Grandpa!  On his actual birthday, May 31st, we had a little date night (what a treat that was)!  Uncle Jesse came over to babysit and I took Travis out to a surprise dinner at Ruth's Chris.  In our younger days, or should I say, before kids, when we had more discretionary income...hehe, we LOVED to go out to eat at nice restaurants and did so frequently!  Ruth's Chris became one of our favorite steak spots, and it holds a very special place in our hearts........when we got married on the beach in Riviera Maya, Mexico (just the two of us), we celebrated our wedding night by going to the Ruth's Chris in Cancun.  Anyway, that was the last time we were there and so we had fun going back and indulging a bit for Trav's big day!  Here's us then, and my hubby now..........love him more today than I did back then!  30 is going to be amazing!!

Happy Summer from our house to yours!!

Baby Belly, Round 2!!

We're cruising right along with pregnancy #2...and that baby belly has made it's appearance a little earlier than last time.  Here's a few pics that we've taken to document our journey the second time around...

 A little over 4 weeks on March 26th...and the results!  Yes!!

Marley announces her BIG SISTER status to the world mid-May!

12 Weeks on May 18th

 

Almost 14 Weeks on May 31st...belly is a growin'!!

The plan is NOT to take weekly pictures, it just so happened that I did the last few weeks so that I could see for myself the difference between my belly when I was pregnant with Marley and with this pregnancy.  I grabbed an old picture of me during my 1st pregnancy.  Here I am at about 16 weeks pregnant with Marley..........

 

I guess the growing big is nothing to complain about!  I have a baby growing inside of me and I'll just let my body do what it needs to in order to keep that process going!  Aside from the "showing earlier than I expected" stuff, the pregnancy has been a breeze (knock on wood).  I've had almost the exact same, and actually I can't name something that's different, pregnancy as I did with Mars.  No morning sickness, no food aversions, nothing really to note other than TIREDNESS, which I hope is going to die off a bit.  I had my 14 week check-up today and all was great.  We heard the baby's heartbeat for the first time.  We had a chance to see the heartbeat during our 2 previous ultrasounds, but this time, to hear it.......oh that is such a wonderful sound!  A solid 146 bpm, which is exactly the range that Marley usually clocked in at while in my tummy.  I still have a feeling the baby is a girl, but time will tell.  I've been known to be wrong a time or two in my life (don't tell my hubby that)!  I'm up 6lbs for the first trimester...not too shabby considering I took the hubs to dinner at Ruth's Chris Steakhouse last night to celebrate his 30th Birthday...............I had steak, potatoes, a big salad, creme brulee (all to myself).  Uff-da!  I was certain I'd hop on that scale in the morning and be up 5 more pounds.  For the most part I'm craving pretty healthy foods (apples, berries, big salads....crazy, right?), so I think I'll just keep doing what I'm doing, walking with Marley and Sasha at night and limiting that pints of Ben & Jerry's Late Night Snack Ice Cream I eat to a minimum.  Yes, Trav has had to go to multiple stores to find it for me because it was ALL I WANTED!!  Well, that and the B.T. McElrath Salty Dog chocolate bars.  A local chocolatier with a tie to my sis-in-law's fiance..........if you haven't tried one, you need to.  Heaven, seriously.  The only thing better would be eating a few squares of it with a big glass of red wine.  Soon enough!!

Wishing you all a happy weekend.  Looks like summer is finally here, thank God!  Enjoy the heat and the sunshine and all that fun stuff that comes with summertime!